#NerdsUnite: What To Do When a Guy Doesn't Want to Talk

Talk Nerdy To Me’s @StaffWriter:

There's nothing more frustrating than when you're trying to have a conversation with someone, but they just won't talk.

 Maybe you've been talking to them for a while, and they suddenly go quiet, or maybe they don't even seem to be listening to what you're saying. It can be frustrating, and it's hard to know what to do about it.

There are a few things that you can do to try and get your guy to start talking again.

Don't Make Them Uncomfortable

First of all, make sure that you're not doing anything that might be making them uncomfortable. Sometimes people go quiet because they feel like they're intruding on your conversation, or they're not sure what to say. 

If you can make them feel more comfortable, they'll be more likely to start talking.

Ask Them a Question

The art of conversation is a delicate one, and sometimes it can be hard to keep the momentum going. If you find yourself in a lull, there are a few things that you can do to get things moving again.

One is to ask your date a question.

You can ask them about their day, what they're doing later, or anything else that you want to know. Asking a question will give them something to respond to, and it will help get the conversation going again.

Another thing that you can do is to share something about yourself.

This can be anything from your favorite food to your favorite place to travel. Sharing something about yourself will help your date learn more about you, and it will give them an opportunity to share something about

Talk About Yourself

You can always talk about yourself.

This will help keep the conversation going, and it will give the other person something to respond to. You can talk about your hobbies, what you do for work, or anything else that you want to share.

And who knows? Maybe your date will find your stories just as fascinating as you do. So next time you're struggling to keep the conversation going, remember that you can always fall back on talking about yourself.

Give Them Time

Conversation is a two-way street. If you want your guy to open up to you, then you need to give them time to talk.

All too often, people try to fill every moment of silence with chatter, but this can be off-putting. Give them time to talk at their own pace.

The last thing they need is to be pushed beyond their comfort zone. That may make them clam up even more.

Give Them Space

When a man says he needs space, it can be confusing and even frightening for the woman in his life. After all, doesn't space mean he's pulling away?

In reality, though, space is often just what a man needs to feel more connected to his partner. If a man feels overwhelmed or bogged down in day-to-day conversations, he may start to feel like he's losing himself.

By taking some time to be alone, he can reconnect with his own thoughts and feelings, allowing him to come back to his relationship with fresh perspectives and a better ability to communicate. If your man says he needs some space, try not to take it personally.

It may just be that he needs some time to recharge before he's ready to talk to you again.

Choose the Right Timing

When it comes to relationships, timing is everything.

If you're feeling like your guy is shutting down and withdrawing, it might just be that the timing isn't right for him to open up. There could be a lot going on in his life that he's not ready to share yet.

Maybe he's going through a tough time at work or dealing with a personal issue.

Or, maybe he's just not ready to get emotionally intimate with you yet. Whatever the reason, if a guy doesn't want to talk, it might just be that the timing isn't right. So, instead of pushing him to open up, try giving him some space.

Let him come to you when he's ready. In the meantime, focus on enjoying your own life.

Go Slow

As a dating coach, I often tell my clients to take things slow with guys who don't want to talk.

It can be tempting to try to get a guy to open up by talking about all of your own feelings and experiences, but this usually backfires. Guys who are reticent to talk about themselves often interpret this as needy behavior, and it can push them away.

Instead, try to mirror the guy's behavior.

If he's being closed off, don't force him to open up. Instead, give him the space to come to you on his own terms. Over time, he may start to feel more comfortable sharing his thoughts and feelings with you.

Be Polite and Understanding

There are some men who just don't want to talk right now.

And that's okay. Maybe he's had a long day at work and he's just not in the mood to talk. Maybe he's feeling overwhelmed and needs some time to himself. Whatever the reason, it's important to be polite and understanding.

If he's not in the mood to talk, don't take it personally.

Manage Your Emotions Until He's Ready to Talk

Most men aren't very good at talking about their emotions. This can be frustrating for women, who often want to talk about their feelings to feel closer to their partners.

However, it's important to remember that you can't control him or force him to talk.

The best thing you can do is to manage your own emotions until he's ready to open up. This doesn't mean that you must bottle up your feelings, but it does mean that you might need to find other ways to express yourself.

For example, you could journal about your thoughts and feelings, or talk to a friend or therapist. Once he sees that you're capable of managing your emotions, he may be more likely to feel comfortable talking about his own.