#NerdsUnite: The difference between domme and dominatrix
I've said this before, and I will SAY IT AGAIN, I am not not not a pro-domme or dominatrix. Period end of sentence. I am merely a guest in this wonderful community and completely elated at all of the opportunities that have been presented.
After my post about heading to the brothel, I got this email ...
First off, when I first started writing about my experiences I called myself a dominatrix out of sheer ignorance. I had heard the term somewhere in pop culture and clearly recycled it.
I was then corrected by a reader of the site who informed me that if I called myself a dominatrix it meant I got paid for my services. What I do with my slaves is rooted in lifestyle and not income. Primary source or otherwise, I don't give a flying fuck, that was just what I was told. My perspective was skewed based on that dynamic.
I totally get that escorts are clearly pouncing on the space and I'd genuinely be pissed too especially if this is something you believe in. I agree that prostitution should be legal (especially considering FIRST HAND how many of my guy friends have paid for sex) but that is neither here nor there. Clearly those girls are just capitalizing on a market.
I'm extremely, extremely grateful you sent me all of that information re: more of the private clubs to go to. The truth of the matter is, I'm scared SHITLESS to visit those places. I'm only going to a brothel in the morning because it's my friend that happens to be doing webwork for them. I've known him for 6 years and if he says I have to check something out, I will. I've been all over the country visiting sex clubs. I've found different experiences at them all. Some positive, some stories I will save for a later date. I'm inspired by the community and inspired by how much it is helping me come into my own skin as a person and as an entrepreneur.
As I've also discussed on the Suicide Girls blog.
Tributes are mandated in the community. Period end of sentence. It has nothing to do with the actual product (and this is coming from a minimalist) but rather the gifting process from something lesser than you. (See what I did there? "something" not "someone!") I will make certain slaves buy me shoes, but most I make run errands and get me my very specific drink from Starbucks. Everything in this scenario is psychological. It has very little to do with the end product. I could tell them to pick up trash by the side of the road and if they were given a command they would know to do it.
I genuinely cannot get caught up in the subtleties of it though at the end of the day. If I post that I am one thing, I will STILL get yelled at by everyone else that believes something else. I can say from a completely neutral perspective that I have found the labeling of it to be in the eye of the beholder. And that's what is GREAT about being a guest in your loverly community, I am merely here to explore, examine, and document a first hand experience. I cannot and will not speak for you guys. I am just Jen and this is what I am experiencing.
I will from this point forth continue to call myself a domme because I have come to a place where I identify with that experience. I will speak to the women tomorrow at Sheri's Ranch and find out what they call themselves, and then, and only then, will I further speak on that first hand experience.
All I know is that in exactly 12 hours I am going to be in a car on my way to a brothel to spend a day with women that are going to kick my ass and take names.
I am so. fucking. excited.
Yay life and yay open mindedness!!!!
Thanks for reaching out! Uberly appreciated!!!
Want to follow my live tweets/ pics and video of the experience? Follow @JenFriel on twitter. xo
#nerdsunite
