#RealDeal: Is Love Blind? (Love Lessons from the Hit Dating Show)
Talk Nerdy To Me’s @StaffWriter:
Love Is Blind is a mega-popular TV show where men and women "date" each other in isolated pods. With a wall between them, the contestants connect emotionally without ever seeing the other person—at least, until someone proposes and they get engaged.
After a brief in-person meeting, the couples who have connected and gotten engaged fly to a "honeymoon" resort to see if their physical connection matches their emotional connection.
If all goes well, they get married four short weeks later.
Here are love lessons from Love Is Blind.
Disclaimer: If you have not seen Love Is Blind, this article does not reveal any specific spoilers. However, some are inferred without any names.
Is Love Blind?
Is love truly blind? Based on the show, the answer is a strong...maybe.
The premise of Love Is Blind is that you can fall in love with someone without ever seeing them. And while the contestants on the show did seem to form strong connections, not all of those connections lasted.
In fact, one couple who got engaged on the show broke up soon after getting married.
And several couples ended abruptly at the altar in an awkward and public, "I don't."
So, what can we learn from Love Is Blind?
Here are a few quick lessons before we dive into deeper insights:
1) You can't judge a book by its cover.
2) Physical attraction is important (but it's not everything).
3) Communication is key.
4) Take your time before getting engaged.
5) Don't rush into anything.
Love is definitely not blind—at least, not always. Some level of physical attraction is an element of a healthy relationship, and you need to make sure you're compatible with someone before getting too serious.
Lesson #1: Don't Keep Any Secrets
One of the big, dramatic moments in Love Is Blind Season 2 resulted from one of the guys dropping a truth bomb on his fiancé on their pre-marriage "honeymoon." Being honest upfront may not have changed the ultimate outcome, but it would have at least softened the outcome.
Lesson learned: Don't keep secrets from your partner, especially if they're potentially harmful. If you have something you need to share, do so in a calm and collected manner. And be prepared for the fallout.
Love Is Blind is an interesting show because it really tests the idea of love at first sight.
While some people might scoff at the idea, the contestants on Love Is Blind seemed legitimately connected to one another.
Lesson #2: Be All-In or All-Out
Some of the emotional trainwrecks on the show could have been avoided if the contestants would have been all-in or all-out. More than once, one person in a potential couple vacillated on the fence of uncertainty.
Instead of being honest and romantically cashing in their chips, they continued to lead the other person on. Predictably, this led to disaster.
Lesson learned: If you're not all-in, then get out. Don't waste someone's time by stringing them along.
Lesson #3: How You Listen and Respond Is Everything
One of the biggest problems with couples on the show was a lack of communication. Couples were moving forward through a short engagement period without ever really communicating in a conducive manner.
If they had simply listened to and validated each other, the couples could have avoided most of the drama and conflict. Instead, they chose defensiveness, anger, and blame.
Lesson learned: Talk to your partner! This one is pretty self-explanatory, but it's so important that it bears repeating. Communication is key in any relationship.
Lesson #4: You Can't Force Physical Attraction
While physical attraction is important, it can't be forced. More than once on the show, one person was trying to force themselves to be attracted to their partner.
This invariably led to disaster because it's not sustainable in the long term. Plus, it's just really uncomfortable for everyone involved.
Lesson learned: Let things flow naturally. If you're not physically attracted to your partner, it's probably not going to work out in the long run.
Lesson #5: Take Things Slow
One of the biggest takeaways from Love Is Blind is that you should take things slow when getting into a relationship. This means that you shouldn't rush into anything, especially an engagement.
Remember that things can change, and you don't want to get too invested in someone if they're not the right fit for you.
Lesson learned: Don't rush through dating, engagement, and marriage. A short courtship does not guarantee that a marriage will not last. However, taking time to get to know someone increases the odds of a successful relationship.
Lesson #6: Be Honest About Your Feelings
The biggest lesson that can be gleaned from Love Is Blind is arguably to just be honest with your feelings. This means being upfront with your partner about what you're looking for and what you expect from the relationship.
It also means communicating effectively, as well as being willing to listen to your partner. If you can do all these things, then your relationship has a much better chance of succeeding.
Lesson learned: Honesty is the best policy in any relationship. If you can't be honest with your partner, then it's probably not going to work out in the long run.
Lesson #7: Don't Project Your Feelings on Others
In both current seasons, at least one person (usually a guy) projected his feelings of attraction and certainty on another person. Every time, it was obvious to the viewer that the relationship was severely one-sided.
This lopsided attraction always ended in broken hearts.
Lesson learned: Don't assume other people feel as strongly about you as you do for them. Watch their behaviors and gauge their level of attraction by what they say and do.
Lesson #8: Love Is Blind (Sometimes)
Most of the couples who got engaged in the pods were very happy with their partner's appearance. It's also true that, almost entirely, the couples that got engaged and move on with the show, fell into the category of traditional North American beauty standards.
Lesson learned: Appearances can be deceiving. Just because someone looks great on the outside, doesn't mean that they're a good match for you. Don't let your physical attraction override everything else.
Final Thoughts
Love Is Blind is a fascinating show that offers a lot of lessons about love.
While it might not be perfect, it does a great job of illustrating the importance of communication, honesty, and taking things slow. Hopefully, we can all learn from these lessons and have better relationships because of them.
