#WTF: Dear Boston, I am very confused by your mating rituals
Hello again nerderinos. If you've been reading this site for at least the last week or so, you're pretty aware that I am having problems of EPIC PROPORTIONS regarding the dating scene here in Boston.
Seriously ... it's not only BAD here ... it's REALLY FUCKING BAD. And all the locals, and people that I've tweeted with about it - say the same thing, "it's just how dudes are."
Guys out here will NOT approach girls at a bar. I've literally stopped short of holding up a sign that says "Free to a good fuck," and gotten nada. (FTR, I'm not even necessarily looking to get some - just genuinely go out on a date with a dude that doesn't know who I am online. IRL boy meets IRL girl. IRL boy thinks IRL girl is cute. IRL boy asks IRL girl out on a date. That's all I'm askin' here!)
It's bad. Really fucking bad. But I'm at least taking my findings and am able to articulate better to males and females about dating in this area. Research wasn't intended, but every experience in life to me is one I can learn from.
ALLLLLL that being said, this morning I had something rather unexpected happen.
I was walking to the T station on this little side street by where I'm staying, and RIIIGGHHHHTTTTTT as I was getting to the curb about to cross the street, this car pulls up from behind me - turning right, which literally put his car right in front of me - and the duderino shouts out, hey! Would you like a ride?
WOOOAHHHHHHH!!! My first thought was, where the FUCK did you come from??
Seriously. Men, don't ever ... and I mean EVER approach a woman on the street like that unless you're about to kidnap her and take her into your creepy white van.
My inner ninja IMMEDIATELY popped out going into attack mode - and was literally about to throw down.
I am totally not even kidding. I've been grabbed on the streets before, and I fight those fuckers BACK!!! (True story: I've also used a knife to fight off robbers when I was 16. This one = seen it. been there. done that.)
When a dude approaches me like that I go from my happy-go-lucky hippie Jen Jen mode to ATTACK - AND YOU DON'T WANT THAT!!!
On a cellular level my adrenaline kicked in and I yelled to him "NO!" But .25 seconds later, my hormones kicked in, and I thought - holy fuck, this dude is HOT!
He looked clean and presentable. Obviously driving to work or somewhere, and on this mostly cloudy sprinkling day in Boston, I'm sure was just trying to be a nice guy.
He waved and drove off.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I thought as he pulled away.
Why on EARTH didn't you just pull over and say, hey! I think you're pretty cute. Can I take you out sometime?
Had that been his approach, I absolutely 100% would have said yes. Albeit, I would have met him somewhere ... well lit ... but I totally would have at least grabbed a beer with the duderino and not gone all ninja and be prepared to throw the fuck down.
I am deeply saddened that the ONE time a dude approached me in Boston, my first response was to attack him ... and not even in a fun sexual way, like in a - you're about to take a visit to the ER.
Really love life? Could you GET any worse????
T-minus 6 days til NY. Get me OUT of Boston!!!!!!!!
#Fail
