Fun with #OKCupid: 3 emails ... 3 different responses

First up, if you haven't read my OKC profile - you can check it out over yonder. Might make some sense to the things guys reply to, haha. But for reals, these are all actual emails I've received in the last 48 hours, and my actual responses back to them. It is through this transparent experience that I hope you all can take away some knowledge on what works and what doesn't in the hopes of making your online dating experiences that much more fanschmastically awesome. YAYYYY ONLINE DATING YAYYY!!! K ... cool ... here we go ...

... It's funny actually, this week I got pretty much the same two emails over and over. One was from dudes complimenting me on the site and my writing style (THANK YOU DUDES!!!!), and the other two were about Jello. No, like literally ...

This is a great email! He's clearly pulling the fact that I say in my profile "I spend a lot of time wondering what it is like laying in a pool of jello" - and responding in an engaging and analytical manner. Sure, there's a misspelling, but that can be overlooked.

Actual response: Hello there!

K. This is a good bad one. You first doable action in sending an email on a dating website is getting the female to respond. That's ALLLLLLL that you have to do. You don't have to plan the date, think about what our kids will be named, if I will like your mother's cooking, and mind your father's gropey hands during the holidays. Who cares?! Break it down ... get the female to respond, first and foremost. Chicks are INUNDATED with emails on dating websites. Seriously - it took me 48 hours to max out my inbox.

That being said, this email sucks. You're "intrigue" by my profile ... and you want to be friends? Dude, I'm not on OKC for friends. So you're new, congratulations! would you like an award or a breast to pin it on? That's like walking into a bar and saying, hey, it's my first time here random chick next to the jukebox. Can we totes be besties??

Actually, come to think of it, that might be pretty funny and she might befriend you - but whatever, on a dating site, that's just not going to happen. I'm not going to be your friend, and in fact I'm not going to respond to this email. Not being cold, just period end of sentence. ALLLLL this guy would have had to say to get a response from me (which I'm sure that was what he was looking for) would be to pull one detail from my profile and ask me to elaborate.

Example: You say you can't live without adventures, been on any lately?

One sentence. Bonus points for being under 140 characters - and boom, I would have responded to that.

That email? Not so much.

Actual response: none

HAHAH this is great! Again, he took this detail from my profile and provided an analytical answer to something I spend a lot of time thinking about. Kudos!

Actual response: You are now making me rethink the surface to more of a marshmallow base.

Happy online dating, nerds!!! xoxoxoxxoxox

#nerdsunite