Dear TNTML, I have a #confession to make ...
So, I have a confession to make.
Like a big confession.
A big ... big ... confession.
One that I've actually been keeping from you guys for a few weeks now. Yep, WEEKS!!!! Not my thing. I tell you guys everything, cause like, you are my everything. Alrite, spit it out Jen ...
I have a crush.
A big crush.
A ridiculously big crush.
Here's how it all went down ...
First though, lemme grab a song ...
Whomp there it is! Well, not literally cause like that would be a different song, but you get the idea.
I've known this duderino for a few months. He's SUPER well respected in the social space. Like crazy well respected and pretty much a super big deal, but he's also incredibly humble ... and very genuinely a rad human being.
We were then introduced personally just a few weeks ago by none other than a reader of this loverly site, and now a very dear friend. We started off with a few gchats here and there, and then things progressed naturally to skype ... and OMMGGGGG you guys, our first skype I totes got butterflies. No, like seriously ... BUTTERFLIES FROM A VIDEO CHAT?!?!?! That's definitely a nerdy first for me.
OMG that entire chat I couldn't stop blushing. I turn RRREEEEEEDDDDDD and get really super quiet when I get like that. Fortunately, he's a good conversation starter person ... omg you guys, I literally couldn't even say anything. He's so fucking hot, man. It's REDIC ... but he doesn't get it, which makes it that much more endearing.
After that first skype we have had subsequent skypes almost every night ... which for me btw, is super weird. I do not do not do not want to talk to ANYONE every day. Seriously. I talk to my parents once a week, my brother every other week, and the rest of the world as it happens. I'm very very very focused on what I'm doing right now, and being so bat shit requires a certain degree of personal space. I like doing what I'm doing, and don't want a distraction - I can very happily say however, every. single. night. I look forward to chatting with him. Dude, a guy that can keep my super ADD butt's attention? AH-MAZING!
So, he's now flying down from Canada for the weekend on Saturday (he's not Canadian, but just lives there now), and I cannot believe in 48 hours I am going to have my first kiss with a dude that I have a crush on.
It's insane, and I'm kinda losing my mind right now.
HAHA it was funny, I asked him during one skype if he was emotionally available. I flat out said that I wasn't looking for anything necessarily, but I hate it when things get ruled out before I even have a chance to think about it. If a dude isn't emotionally available, I just want nothing to do with it.
He laughed, and said he was perfectly emotionally available.
I then piped up and said great! Maybe now my new pattern is to go for the physically unavailable.
He's so witty, such a geek, and has this childlike quality of sort of examining the world for purposes of exploration rather than placing judgement; it's captivating.
There are so many things I could tell you all about this dude, but I'm totes being a girl right now and gushing.
I just like that every day he makes me want to conquer the world- I like that he pushes me and opens my mind to things that I hadn't even thought of. He cuts out the bullshit wall that I try to put up, and I dunno ... just keeps it all so real. It's refreshing, and no matter where it goes I can very genuinely tell that at least I will have a new friend in my life for however long our paths are meant to cross.
Besides, anyone that makes you smile as much as this duderino has made me smile is certainly worthy of a post ... but don't get me wrong, I am also super excited to bone him for the first time. YAYYYY!!!!!! Sex!!!! =)
We shall see. 48 more hours.
Forty eight long ... long ... long hours.
K ... back to editing ... peace love and lollipops!!! Thanks for letting me share!!! =) =) =)
xoxo #nerdsunite
literally