#NerdsUnite: Playground Pumpin'

<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Eric. He is a MAASSTTEERRR social dynamics expert that will be talking about his experiences in the field from both an expert, and experience perspective. He's not just saying "this is how to get the girl" he's here to share his actual life stories and lessons learned from them. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT ERIC !!</editorsnote>

#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @Redolpho

Since I overcame my depression I have been hard at work with my social media company and my new job at the hostel. If I wasn’t already busy enough the hostel keeps me working an insane amount of hours. The crazy thing is that you are surrounded by so many people that continue to come and go. Different accents, different personalities and sooooooooo many beautiful women. After working at the hostel for only a few days I immediately knew that there would be some challenges in regards to pumpin’.

I sleep in a dorm style room with a roommate who is a totally cool guy from Germany but it’s an “employee” dorm and nobody else is supposed to be allowed in. No business wants you banging the customers (well I guess there are some businesses that encourage it) so some discretion is a must. There is no policy in regards to sleeping with the guests and although it’s frowned upon, I’m sure that they know someone’s fuckin’.

I know I am a social coach and all but I have been so forking busy that I haven’t gotten laid in over two months. I had a steamy make out session with this six foot two fashion student from the UK but that was about it. I am always planting seeds and hanging out around the hostel and it was time to close the deal. I did in epic fashion.

I had spent all day with these two amazing girls at the beach. One super successful social media guru from the UK and another super cool chick from Montreal. After our day at the beach we went out in Santa Monica to watch this amazing band called Toledo play at Harvelles. They were fuckin’ phenomenal. It was this crazy fusion of funk, jazz, soul and hip-hop. Mix that with burlesque dancers hanging from the rafters above the bar, some dancing and we were having a great night.

We decided to walk home along the beach and met an alcoholic fishing couple out for a night fish. The lady whispered to me through all five of her teeth that she thought I was beautiful. We continued skipping over homeless people along the walking path until we found the swings. Like a couple of school children we all hopped on and played for a while. The weather was still so warm that we thought a light night swim was in order. Well I don’t wear underwear so I stripped down to my birthday suit and jumped in. The girls got down to their underwear and joined me.

By the time we got back to the hostel the common rooms were already closed so we made our way to bed. I wasn’t done with my night yet. I have needs. I waited for the girls to separate and the French-Canadian happened to be staying near my room. I walked to her door with her and made my move in the threshold of the all female dorm. We ate each other’s face for a couple minutes and then both gave each other the doe eyes that said, “We need to bang this out”. I walked in my room with her only to find my roommate still awake and unhappy at my proposition for him to continue working on his laptop while I hooked up behind him. “How inconsiderate of him,” I thought.

I am a determined individual and I wasn’t going to let this stop me from getting what I wanted. I grabbed a couple towels and led her out of the hostel and to the beach. We scouted the area for an appropriate place to do the damn thing. I don’t think the children's jungle gym was exactly “appropriate” but it was going to work. I made us a little bed and our clothes fell to the floor. With both our heads in each other’s crotch we were both enjoying ourselves quite thoroughly.

I could tell that she had a lot to say but her English was limited so we were on the quiet side. Bums and late night cyclists rode by where we were in plain sight. Fuck it. After she had recovered from a long orgasm she asked me if I had a condom. I did not. She continued to go down on me and all the sudden I realized everything had become REALLY itchy! I had been eaten alive by mosquitos. I tried to enjoy myself but the growing welts all over my body were so distracting. We threw our clothes on and headed back to the hostel. 

I peeked in my room and my roommate had passed out for the night. YES! He would definitely wake up if we used the bed so being the chivalrous gent that I am I invited her into my bathroom. I again laid out a couple towels, grabbed the condoms from my backpack and it was on. This time she couldn’t hold in her words anymore. Her beautiful French came pouring from her lips. This is the second time that I have had a woman talk dirty to me in French and it is phenomenal. After we finished she looked up from the floor and started laughing hysterically, She realized that her point of view was something she’d never forget. The underside of the sink, the empty public-restroom toilet paper holder, and underside of the toilet. 

I was sad to see her go because we genuinely had a great time together. I love girls who are up for an adventure. 

#thatisall

If you’d like to share your stories please feel free to tweet me at @redolpho or email me at eric dot rudolph dot carrillo at gmail dot com