#NerdsUnite: Ask That Nerdy Chick (I'm swooning, but is he really over her?)
It is my goal for 2012 to take a lot of my weird and wonky experiences as a lifecaster and help nerdy peeps out by providing a frank (not shirley) and honest answer to some weird and potentially random questions you may have about life.
Here is an email I got the other day ...
Wow! Wow! Wow! What an amazing life experience this is for you. This is a test my darling!!
Here's the pooper scooper ...
Everything that my dating experience has taught me is that life is reflective - period end of sentence. I used a FUCKING ALGORITHM to pick dates for me and of those I found the only FOOOUUUUURRRRRR that were emotionally unavailable. (103 dates in 9 monts, 11 second dates, 6 I slept with, 4 I wanted to date.)
The question isn't "can this guy be over his relationship so quickly" - it's what in you is attracted to him?
I would BET MY FREAKING LIFE on the fact that he's emotionally unavailable, (since genuinely time does heal all wounds and this guy hasn't even physically been separated from her for that long) so what in you is resonating on that level with this guy? This is an AMAZING test for you to go discover and play with.
The sparks you feel on a date, or the connection you feel with someone off the bat isn't indicative of "fate, destiny" or any other commercialization - rather only a kinship in emotions.
You need to do some self exploration, mama.
Let me ask you this ... have you allowed yourself to get close to someone since the last guy you dated? I commend you GREATLY on at least getting back out there, but as I learned first hand anyone can go out on countless dates, but not just anyone will allow themselves to get caught. Are you still harboring any anger from your previous relationship? Any shame? Guilt? Anything?
Suggestion: Give this guy some space. (I did this with one of the 4 guys I was super into actually.) Set a definitive time period in which you guys won't talk to each other. Since he's SO new, I kid you not when I say he should have at least until January. Give him some time to shake things off, and you some time to go explore your own self emotionally. If you guys are meant to be together you can be in the new year. It's symbolic actually, a new year and potentially a new relationship!!! But either way, you. have. to. stay. strong. No texts, no calls, no Facebook stalking, nothing. Complete radio silence on both of your parts until the new year and theeeennnnnnnnnn post the next day hangover you guys can go explore.
Hope it works out babydoll, and please please please keep me posted!!
Got a question? Drop me an email! JenFriel at TalkNerdyToMeLover dot com
ORRRRR you can message me on Facebook and if it's within 140 characters on the twitter!