#NerdsUnite: Confessions of an Unwed Bride (The Best Part About Endings Is Beginnings)
<editorsnote> Nerds, meet by buddy Julie! She's my roomie, we met on Craiglist, and she is 1,000 flavors of everything awesome sauce. The reason why she had a room in her apartment however is a mighty long story. See, Julie was dating a duderino for 8 years. Yep, they were engaged to be wed and all that snazzy jazzy stuff. Now the engagement is off and Julie is attempting to heal from her loss; these series of posts are her best attempt. HIT IT JULIE! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @ItsMeJoolie
It's been quite awhile since I have written anything. I really needed some time to keep to myself while I tried to figure out what my new 'normal' feels like. Also, I started seeing someone and I honestly wasn't sure what to write about. I didn't want to mess anything up with him. But I'm now ready to update you all on my life. There's also a few nuggets of wisdom I wish to impart upon you guys on the topic of break-ups, getting back on your feet and how to make sure you are actually living life and not just going through the motions.
Soooo...guess what?
This unwed bride has a boyfriend.
I still can't get over it. Just saying that line, "I have a boyfriend" is just...soo I don't even know. Clearly, I'm not used to the whole concept yet. It's nice though.
Me and this dude met through the lovely @meowmistidawn on her birthday back in February. The way we met is pretty funny. We were both at Misti's birthday party at Bar Sinister @clubbarsinsiter in Hollyhood and I don't remember seeing him. At all. I vaguely remember seeing him in the parking lot when we all were figuring out who was riding with who back to Misti's place. It wasn't until we were literally outside of her door that I noticed him and introduced myself. We started off with where are you from and the usual pleasantries. When I found out that he is from Indiana, I laughed inside. The cute, musician I had been dating since November had dropped off of my radar two weeks prior is also from Indiana. (For whatever reason I know a ton of people out in LA not just from Indiana but that attended college at Indiana University, so many that it's officially weird.) So logically my next question was to ask him if he went to IU.
"Yes, you did?" I think I asked him his age. And then, a shot in the dark, "Do you know XXXX XXXXX (fill in with musician I had been dating that totally broke my heart)?"
He said yes and I was completely in shock. No matter how big LA actually is, so often it feels like the smallest city ever to me.
And then, more shock as he said, "Yeah, we were in a band together in college."
NO. FREAKIN. WAY.
The story gets crazier. Not only did my future boyfriend know musician dude and not only were they in a band together but...
"After I broke up with my girlfriend, he started dating her."
So...they dated the same chick.
As he and I are talking I get the sense that he doesn't have the best opinion of musician dude. He checks facebook and realizes that they aren't friends on there and then wonders if they ever were and if the musician deleted him. He makes a comment that, of course, all of their mutual friends are just girls. He says he doesn't hate him or anything but he always struck him as someone who had it easy. Being in my position, as someone who unknowingly a week later would be getting a Dear John phone call from the musician, but could already tell he was over it (and by it I mean me), it was nice to hear someone not have the best opinion of him.
We spoke about what instruments we played in band (me, the oboe for concert and flute and mellophone for marching. Him, the trumpet). The conversation flowed very easily between us.
The next day I got a text from Misti letting me know that he asked for my info. He didn't take very long to text me and ask me if I wanted to hang out. I jokingly asked him if this was a plot a decade in the making to get back at musician dude. A few days later I got tickets to see The Roots and decided to invite him along. He picked me up and opened the car door for me (to this day I've only opened my own car door a handful of times). We spent so much time talking that we missed a good chunk of the show. We talked about everything, including our exes! He also just went through a broken engagement so unlike musician dude, who had no concept of what I've been through, this guy understood.
Our second date was a lot of fun; we went to see The Harlem Globetrotters, which was underwhelming because I think they should still all have afros, but we had fun anyways. At dinner he told me that he thought of these two times we spent together as hangouts, not dates. I was kinda embarrassed, I told him I thought they were dates. I believe it was decided that they officially were dates by the end of that night when we kissed in his car when he dropped me off. I was so worried he would be a bad kisser, many people are, but he wasn't.
Three months later on Cinco de Mayo we decided to become exclusive. I was really scared but he is SUCH A GREAT, KIND PERSON that I knew this gamble would be in my favor. At first it was weird to have a boyfriend that wasn't my ex, but now it feels great to have a boyfriend that isn't my ex. This guy is so smart, talented and compassionate that he makes moving on easy.
