#NerdsUnite: Around the world with @HeatherReusz
<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Heather. She's a nerd who is currently living in Japan by way of Chicago. Yep, talk about a culture shock. She's here today to talk about her life, love (which she is currently balancing long distance) and all things nerd. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT HEATHER!!!</editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @HeatherReusz
I wanted to go into a little bit more depth about how I came to work and live in Japan. I know you all already know that I’m an anime nerd and very into the culture but I actually applied for this job on a whim in a time in my life where I was looking to start over. But, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s start at the beginning: 3 years ago.
Three years ago, I thought that my life was perfect. I was about to graduate from college with a job already waiting for me. I had a wonderful boyfriend who I had been seeing for a year. I even had a house only 20 mins from my job with one of my best friends. I thought I had everything a girl could ever want all set up for me. But nothing quite felt right or worked how I thought it should.
The number one thing that I was most unhappy with was my job. I got a degree in education. I had always liked working with kids so it seemed like a natural choice for me. At least, that was what I had convinced myself to think. My first passion in life is theater and singing. No matter where life takes me, I can guarantee I will always find a way to be in some kind of community theater show or local choir. If I were being honest with myself, it also was something that I would have seriously studied in college. But my practical side won out. I wondered what I would do with a theater degree and how I could even make a living. I had also been beat down so much about my weight and image from my high school theater program that I had no confidence in my abilities. I thought education would be a fine plan for me and I grabbed a minor in theater in case I ever changed my mind. It didn’t take me too long to realize, even in college, that teaching was not going to be easy for me. I was a square peg trying to fit into a round hole. That just motivated me even more though. I thought I was the kind of teacher schools needed. Someone who is creative, outspoken, intuitive, and good with technology. I had confidence that it was just the swift judgment of my professors or some of the other ladies in my classes that made me doubt my career choice. Things will be better in the real world, I told myself. Boy was I wrong.
Like all people, I was super excited when I got my job. Who wouldn’t be pumped to have a job waiting for you when you graduated? I also thought I had found the perfect job for me. I was going to teach 8th grade public speaking and help out with the plays on the side. I was going to teach something creative, academic, and valuable. What more could I ask for?! I couldn’t wait to start. It was evident right from the start that I didn’t jive all that well with some of my co-workers. We didn’t get in fights or anything that intense. I just got the vibe that I was not liked or accepted by some of my co-workers. They would constantly shoot down my ideas as far-fetched or roll their eyes when I tried to pitch a cross-curricular speech project. I started to just keep my ideas to myself and teach the way I wanted to teach. It was pretty tough to not feel like I had the best support system at work especially as I tried to wade through my first year teaching.
I knew this was a tough job but, man, I was not prepared for the intensity that is teaching in real life especially at the middle school level. Seriously, teaching is HARD particularly teaching in America. There are so many ridiculous hoops that you have to jump through, so many tests and test scores you have to keep up with, so much administrative bull to deal with, and don’t even get me started on some of the parents…Of course there were parts of it I loved too. I loved my kids. I connected with so many of those artsy nerdy outcasts who felt like they had no one to relate to. It was amazing. I remembered being like that in middle school and was so happy to be a role model and confidant to them. I also adored working with the theater program. I even had some awesome projects and activities that the kids loved and learned from. These little beacons kept me going through my first year but I still felt like something wasn’t quite right. I dreaded going to work and could feel myself getting more depressed. I just felt stuck and unhappy but didn’t know what to do to fix it.
Next time, I get kicked out of the house, my boyfriend moves across the world, and I lose faith in my competency as a teacher. Stay tuned.