#NerdsUnite: Confessions of an Unwed Bride
<editorsnote> Julie Wilson recently endured an agonizing break up with her fiancé after being together for 8 years. She is now in her late 20s and confused about what to do next. These are some of her frustrations, and ways she is attempting to heal from her loss. </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's Julie Wilson
Facebook Breakdown Update
Facebook is still a thorn in my side. It is a constant reminder of everything I don't want to think about. Read my original take on Facebook during/after a break up.
Part I: Changing Your Relationship Status
I guess it's about time - I finally changed my status this week:
Part II: Stalking
Not gonna lie - I have gotten any better about not doing this. Recently found out some stuff I wasn't too happy about this way. It's kind of like the saying "Never go through a man's phone because you will find what you are looking for". Yep.
Part III: Unfriend Your Ex
This hasn't changed, we're not friends on facebook but sometimes because I stalk I see parts of his profile that I think he doesn't realize I can see. It is so annoying when I see mutual friends status updates and there's a comment from him on there. I feel like he's marked his territory or something. I just move on, don't comment.
Part IV: Facebook Breakdown
I seriously lost count of the changes my friends have gone through since my previous fb post. I know two people that have since had a baby, one that is pregnant, one that has gotten engaged, two are getting married in the upcoming months. One wedding I can't go to because it's my ex's best friend. Sucks to know someone for 8 years and then not be able to participate in their life anymore. The other I will be attending by my lonesome. My friend is an angel though, I got the invitation and it included the words "and guest". It is so expensive to have a wedding and you often have to really whittle the list down to fit within budget. To pay for someone who you don't even know is a big gesture. I cried a bit at her generosity. On the flip side, I have two friends that went through divorce. Another friend just got out of a 7 year relationship (omg her and I are each others support systems right now) and one friend who's relationship isn't doing so hot right now so he deactivated his account (I give him props for that).
One last bitch: when my friends "baby up" my status updates. Examples:
me: The days leading up to a vacation go by so slooooowly!
expectant friend: So do the ones leading up to a baby...
me: Can't believe how much can change in one year.
friend with child: Wait till you have a baby... =)
*sigh* but that's the problem! and that's what I am referencing, how much my life has changed, meaning that I am not married and will not be having children soon as I had previously planned.
Part IV: Shitty Status Updates
You have to be so careful when you are sad/angry/lonely/miserable that you don't just run to twitter and fb and start complaining. If you complain too much you will be viewed as a Negative Nancy. People that are constantly looking for self affirmation through social networks will only get eye rolls. I have had the rug completely pulled out from under me and have managed to somehow keep the negative posts to a minimum (pat on the back - it's not easy!). I did however, break my own rule this week when I found out something really upsetting. Oops!
Deactivate Julie, deactivate!!
