Meghan's Metamorphosis: Don't Try to Boil the Ocean
<editorsnote> Nerds, meet my buddy Meghan. She came on board months ago to write for us, and then very unexpectedly had her life change. No like for reals - her first email to me was how she was in this relationship ... and how awesome it was ... like literally a week later, they broke up. She hasn't been able to write for months and is now dipping her toes back in the water. I only have one more thing left to say ... HIT IT MEGHAN!! </editorsnote>
#TalkNerdyToMeLover's @MsMeghanBrown
So I’ve been failing at changing lately.
I’d been doing pretty well for awhile with the whole “Meghan’s Metamorphosis” concept, and then some stuff happened (as it does) and all of a sudden I was back to (almost) square one. The weight I’d lost? Gained back. The “living like a grown-up” progress? Kept it for the most part, but still have keeping-the-kitchen-clean problems. The writing part? Over before it began. I’ve spent some time in the past few weeks feeling pretty awful about the way that 2011 is ending.
My friend Barry is a professional dating coach, and was kind enough to throw me a few sessions on the house. We had our first session today, and I was surprised (and relieved!) by how little we actually talked about dating. We talked about what I’d want in an ideal partner, and, conversely, what that imagined partner would want in a partner. Unsurprisingly, the areas where I fell short were the EXACT ones I’d previously identified: fitness/health, quality of life, and career.
Barry and I also talked about the concept of celebrating little victories. I tend to set myself up to fail by subscribing to the “go big or go home” way of thinking. I want things to be perfect NOW. If I’m not magically 100% perfect NOW I don’t feel like I’m making any progress. So I spend hours crafting these ridiculously complicated lists and schedules that are impossible to keep, and then I throw an internal temper tantrum when I blow it within the first week.
Today Barry said, “don’t try to boil the ocean”. I love that. Because that? Is exactly what I’d been doing. Trying to get everything going at once. I need to work on accepting the fact that the little victories are still victories, and that not being able to CHANGE EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW doesn’t make me a weak, lazy person.
So, Internet. I’m changing speeds. I’ve already accepted that I might not hit my goals for the year... but that doesn’t mean I’m abandoning them. I’m gonna start by boiling a cup of water at a time, and see where I end up.
(If you have any questions for Barry, feel free to contact me through Twitter and I’ll DM you his info!)